Tri-Bond

What do two major league sports teams, traffic signs, and two local churches have in common?

MERGING.

Yup.

The sun was barely peeking over the horizon this morning when I clicked on the television to a SPORTS ALERT! on a cable news channel. Considered a breaking story, it interrupted an important business segment.

According to the sports reporter, “record rainfall during the excavation phase” has caused a premier architecture firm to state a one-year delay in the opening of a much-anticipated stadium.

This fact could keep one of the two So-Cal teams in LA LA LAND–who will be sharing the colossal arena–from rebranding their team, including their uniforms.

Hmmm.

This got me thinking further about an unexpected announcement our pastor only very recently made to our vagabond congregation at the beginning of a worship service.

In a strange twist, we will be combining our church (that has been in search of a building for over five years…) with another local body of believers (with a beautiful structure) whose pastor is retiring after many decades of faithful service.

This is the first CHURCH MERGE my hubby and I will be a part of.

Still reeling from the exciting news–on the drive home, we had an interesting conversation.

“I’ve known of too many church splits. But a church merge? It’s a great thing, right?” I said.

“But it feels the same.” He said.

He glanced over.

After a few seconds of puzzling out his odd answer-

“You mean the hurt feelings, the grieving, and people leaving because they can’t bear the change?” I said.

He nodded.

Meetings with people from both sides of a river that currently separates us found many flinging nervous and good-natured bantering about the Capulets and Montagues as well as the Brady Bunch.

This morning during prayer and more ruminating on this barely weeks away from sharing “four walls” with new brothers and sisters in Christ, I wondered if rules of the road could offer any insight.

Over the course of hurrying to and fro from one errand to the next on the highways in our region, close calls, accidents, and even deaths have happened for failures to properly enter the flow of traffic.

A Google search whisked me to the Washington State Department of Licensing Driver Guide.

This is how I (and prolly many others, too!) feel right now:

Enter drivingtests.org and the section about traffic signs:

“Traffic signs tell you about traffic rules, hazards, where you are, how to get where you are going and where services are located.”

A whole page is dedicated to yielding and right of way!

“You must be alert to what is going on around you–many collisions occur because drivers do not pay enough attention to their driving.”

Further:

“You can avoid distracted driving by remembering the ‘5 D’s’.

  • Dangerous.
  • Deceptive.
  • Destructive.
  • Disabling.
  • Deadly.”

Did you know that merge signs are considered common traffic warning signs?

Not me!

“These signs are usually yellow [such a happy color!] with black lettering or symbols and most are diamond shaped. These signs warn you to slow down and be prepared to stop if necessary. They warn you of sharp curves, special situations, speed zones or hazards ahead.”

No one can tell how the sharing of a massive NFL Football stadium will go for the Chargers and Rams.

And driving my car here and there and everywhere demands vigilance and attention to details. I pray others are doing the same.

A look into God’s Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth found me culling trustworthy truths from Romans chapter 12 to help me as I do my part to ensure a smooth-as-possible-in-light-of-all-the-others-on-this-path transition:

“Therefore I (the apostle Paul) urge you brothers and sisters in view of God’s mercy to:

  1. As living sacrifices offer true and proper worship and be faithful in prayer.
  2. As far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone/live in harmony.
  3. Humbly serve/yield when necessary.
  4. Be devoted to one another in sincere love.
  5. Be joyful in hope!”

“Hope is the confident expectation of something better tomorrow.” -Dr. James Macdonald

 

 

 

 

A Secret Hope

Photo courtesy of Pixaby/Public Domain

So.

After reading inspiring blogs, thought-provoking quotes, and perusing funny memes, I’m still at the how to put together something special for all the I have a mother, am a mother or mother-to-bes?

Lacking close maternal bonds for all of my life, it’s tough to know what to say.

BUT

I have a mother, am a mother and know several mothers-to-be.

To get the bouquet of words assembled let’s start with some lavender:

According to Google, Mother’s Day is a holiday honoring motherhood in different forms throughout the world. The American incarnation of Mother’s Day was created by Anna Jarvis in 1908 and became an official U.S. holiday in 1914.

Those orange, purple, and yellow tulips look nice:

Did you know that parenting is a benefit to longevity?

A www.techtimes.com article called Parents Live Longer Than Childless People-Why Having Children is Tied to Longevity (Adamson, 2017) listed the top three reasons:

  1. Healthier Behaviors
  2. Support System
  3. Social Interaction

(So, to my favorite blue-eyed son AND my favorite brown-eyed son, thank you for calling your mother this week. You’ve helped to extend my life by…um. Calculating. 60-50=10. 10 divided by two equals five. Five divided…okay, by at least the time it took me to write that paragraph!)

How about pink roses next?

A MOTHER’S DAY PRAYER

For quiet joys and peace of mind                                                                     for all that’s gentle, all that’s kind.                                                             For love and hope to light your way,                                                               a little laughter every day.

Yup. Just about there. Hmmm.

Carnations. You pick the color:

Q. Two mothers and two daughters went out to eat. Everyone ate one burger yet only three burgers were eaten.

How is this possible?

A. They were a grandmother, mother, and daughter.

And now, to finish off with baby’s breath:

Aside from having my own children, the greatest joy of my life is to be called Nana by a grandson and a granddaughter.

“Studies have shown that ALL grandchildren are ‘gifted.'” -Unknown

AND

They are “the promise of tomorrow and the hope of dreams come true…”

So. No matter where you fall on the list, here’s to Mom’s everywhere and the secret hope this word bouquet brought some joy to you.

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Every Good Thing

We bid Tori a “bye-bye birdie” on Tuesday night.

All around the sights and sounds of vibrant a stark contrast to the drab inside my heart, as we prepared for the Memorial Service and “burial at River” I’d requested of my veteran-sailor hubby.

Here, children skipping, jumping, and laughing alongside their parents as they strolled past us on local footpaths.

There, a man stowing gear in a dripping power boat pulled from the water.

“If anyone asks–you’ve got some explaining to do.” My hubby said glancing back at the patrol car behind us as we walked to the end of the dock.

In the nine days devoted to caring for the dove egg orphan, there had been zero mishaps. Or even close calls.

Only minutes before the funeral, I’d held the shell to the outdoor light.

Doubt crept in.

What if she needs more time?

Having extended our commitment to Tori’s survival by six days, over a week past the two Wikipedia deems a normal gestation period–was it wishful thinking?

Here’s where memory fogs…

Just as I knelt to put her back on her shredded-paper-packing material nest she rolled out of my hand.

A reflexive cry, then eyes squeezed tightly shut.

I stood frozen, terrified to open them. Afraid not to.

Yank. Up. Courage.

The shell cracked neatly in half revealed the truth:

She’d already succumbed to the second law of thermodynamics.

Have you ever really noticed the constant juxtapositions of life’s every, every, minute?

Living and dying; laughing and crying; hatching and halting.

Reflecting on the past 9/60 of 4&5/2017, I compiled a list of gains in spite of the loss:

  •  Anticipation. The hope (and faith!) for something more.
  •  Joy! Strangers, though surprised, were happy to offer their opinions about: “Can birds smell?” A debate sparked between my hubby and me. The results were mixed. Google it. Hint: Audobon.org
  • Awe. Participation in God’s creation ignited childlike wonder.
  • Connection:
  1. Our youngest son, living in Fifth-gear-land, actually stopped everything to help me (via cell phone) set up an incubation station and encouraged me to seek answers online on how to care for Tori as a feathered friend.
  2. Like April, the Giraffe, Tori garnered her own fan base including a neighbor and several of my friends and blog followers. One, all the way in Switzerland.
  3. Two friends, a silver, and a gold flew to my side that first day to confirm or deny chances for life. We laughed and wept and prayed as we chatted, got caught up, and discussed ways to also help humans in crisis.
  • A prompt. Life is fragile. Handle with care.
  • Inspiration. If God cares about the birds of the air and not a sparrow (or a dove!) falls without Him seeing, think about what that means about how he feels about us (Check out Psalm 139)!
  • Patience. Something about the not knowing stretched this virtue in me.
  • Outward focus. Nurturing Tori forced me to think about something besides a broken relationship in a close relative’s life and other circumstances I have no control over.
  • Acceptance. Letting go of expectations, disappointments, and regret. There was something reverent and beautiful and transcendent about releasing Tori into the vast waters of the Mighty Columbia.

So. Even though things turned out differently than I had hoped, I’m choosing to focus on the larger events set in motion in the brief time shared with one of God’s smaller creatures.

Bereft now occupies Tori’s corner of our living room and the tears flow fast.

But I know the time and effort invested weren’t wasted.

In fact, I’m beyond grateful for every good thing.

 

 

 

Of Fobs and Robbers

“Locks are for honest people.”

Ever heard that quote?

As a kid, it puzzled me, much like the combination I had to learn every school year to get into my locker.

Last night, Fabio made a guest appearance on a cable news show revealing how very recently his and other celebrities’ homes had been broken into and property pilfered.

This month my hubby and I took in one of our cars for an oil change and we brought back an additional SUV with only one key.

A visit to a local locksmith yielded two useless pieces of metal.

Calls to hardware stores and other smith agents netted zero results.

Finally, agreeing the solution involved divesting our bank account, we returned to the dealership where I did some stealing of my own:

“Just who is this Ward we’re pulling for?” I asked the receptionist pointing to the large sign overhead.

Her wide grin proved worth the snatching.

Later, raiding remembrances with my hubby extracted more.

Once after hearing a radio sermon on his way home from work he burst through the front door exclaiming:

“Did you know every time you look in the mirror your observing constant decay? Our bodies are undergoing continual entropy!”

All this proudly delivered like the best and most fascinating news e-v-u-r.

I’m pretty sure that if you could have seen my face, it would have registered shock and a dropped jaw. Crickets may or may not have been heard above me.

Sure enough, the next study of my image while washing my face and brushing my teeth revealed evidence of that robber of youth and vigor: time.

A gray eyelash, dark spots on my cheek and deepening creases on my chin and neck cheated me of joy and contentment.

Days after his imposing proclamation as we drove to local footpaths for a walk my hubby sighed.

“I miss running.”

“So do I.” I sighed back.

His head snapped so fast I feared whiplash.

“You’ve never liked running!”

“I used to run for miles and miles.” I  beamed like a Chesire cat.

“On my horse!”

This gouged a grin.

“I like it when your eyes sparkle, you look especially beautiful.”

“What, for the state of decay I’m in?”

On another trek together beside the rolling Columbia River, feeling plundered again, I poured out my concerns to my hubby.

Our family is missing two precious people in a recent relational breakup, Tori, the dove egg orphan we’re incubating has yet to hatch, and chapter nine of my memoir in progress perplexes.

We talk about:

  • John Ross from our own Washington state being the ninth NFL draft pick (of the first round!).
  • My attending a local junior college observatory showing of Planet Nine. And the fact that Pluto will always be one to us.
  • Guess how many goslings we counted in passing?

Upon returning to our vehicle, we discovered there is no key entry from the passenger side. As my hubby hurried to open the driver side door, I pulled the keyless entry mechanism from my pocket and opened all the doors.

“You’re fob-ulous!” My hubby sang out.

We laughed.

The short drive to the store to shop for groceries found me ruminating on the unusual occurrences involving the number nine and the Serenity Prayer written by American theologian Reinold Niebuhr.

“God grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change,

Courage to change the things I can,

and the wisdom to know the difference.”

Beyond grateful to my heavenly Father for unlocking the secret places of my heart and restoring hope, I whispered,

“You’re fob-ulous.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Life in Bus Passes

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

How do you mark time?

Recently, there’s a trend among the young mom set to snap pics of their “littles” next to a living or even stuffed pet.

Brilliant!

Something stable and unchanging with which to measure growth.

Photos of our two sons in front of a Dutch Elm or Red Maple on the first day of preschool all the way to highschool present a problem.

Trees grow too!

Discovering our oldest son’s personal yearbook I’d assembled at a time when my hubby used our one car to get to work and back, delighted me. Monthly bus passes he’d used to get to school and back next to his cherished face helped me really see him.

A tired smile. A great big grin. A flash of annoyance in his baby-blues.

The passage of time through captured emotion!

We’re nearly 4/12 through another year. The calendar pages flying.

Our family’s grown from four to seven in under a decade.

BUT

I’d hoped for nine.

Joy mingles with sorrow as the month of April wanes.

While I’ve just started my “fifififififties” (as a dear friend likes to say) it’s the last 1/12 for my hubby who’s a tad more “formerly youthful.”

“What about the future?” We’re asking each other more and more.

Residual health issues and financial reversals aside–What do we want life to look like?

Say what you will about Christopher Columbus–his quote inspires:

“Following the light of the Sun we left the Old World behind.”

Would you have the courage to petition a King and Queen to fund your dreams and make the risky voyage across oceans?

Would I?

In my corner of the world, my biggest adventure is incubating and nurturing a dove egg orphaned a day ago.

The odds are stacked against us. But she now has a name: Victoria. Tori for short. Her moniker comes from tor the Hebrew word for dove.

A few friends have rallied around me when the professionals and experts I’ve called offered condolences. My hubby holds me AND his tongue.

It’s just one egg in a world replete with rock pigeons.

Who really cares?

The One Who notices a single sparrow that falls to the ground (Matthew 10:29).

Who’s seen every emoji cross our faces in real life.

Just now the cooing of a mourning dove floated from our back yard.

So, live or die, I can rest assured at having done all to sustain life.

Yup.

That’s a trip worth taking.

Ordinary World

April the Giraffe with her yet-to-be named Calf / Photo courtesy of unknown (04-2017)

Have you heard?

It’s a boy for Oliver and April!

The May-December romance begat a 129 pound, five feet nine inches tall healthy baby on April 15, 2017 at the Animal Adventure Park in Harpursville, NY.

Ordinarily, a Giraffidae gestation period lasts 13-15 months (Wikipedia.org). But this pregnancy stretched-and stretched-and…to nearly 16. So, the due date of April 1, found everyone fooled.

Although usa.today.com reported that over 1.2 million people watched the birth live on YouTube and over 750,000 watched from the zoo’s Facebook page, I would have remained oblivious.

Except.

A few months ago, during a routine haircut, my lovely friend and stylist, Shawna, excitedly shared with me about the giraffe cam she (and a great thousand’s of others!) had discovered.

As we spent more time together, the topic naturally came up in conversation, and so what normally only happens in the far-away and exotic African countries of Niger, Zimababwe, Tanzania, and Kenya became of interest to me, because of my relationship with her.

Standard online research revealed the Giraffa Calfa’s name is up for a vote.

Pix11.com top ten names:

  1. Unity
  2. Patches
  3. Apollo
  4. Patch
  5. Peter
  6. Harpur
  7. Geoffrey
  8. Noah
  9. Ollie
  10. Alyssa’s choice

Being late to the party, per usual, my choice won’t even be considered:  Kungoja, the everyday Swahili word for wait. Kungi or even Goj for short could work, right?

But I can’t wait to tell my nzuri rafiki (Swahili for beautiful friend)!

What fun to pass on to her all I’ve learned: Each individual giraffe has a unique coat pattern. Like a zebra’s stripes or a Dalmatians’ spots.

In the day-to-day drudge of sick-sad-news and typical tasks, I think it would be fair to say that most of us dream of Love. Freedom. Something to awaken our spirits and lift us above the mundane while linking us together.

An average giraffe doing what all Mama mammals do, bringing everyday people together.

Not so ordinary, after all.

I love how Ann Voskamp’s New York Times Best Selling book, one thousand gifts, “dared readers to live fully right where you are.”

“Like most, she hungers to live her one life well. Forget the bucket lists about once-in-a-lifetime experiences.

‘How,’ Voskamp wondered, ‘do we find joy in the midst of deadlines, debt, drama and daily duties? What does a life of gratitude look like when your days are gritty, long, and sometimes dark? What is God providing here and now?'”

Not long ago, my youngest son answered in a similar way, when I asked what he would tell his friends to encourage them:

First, he told me to find Ben Howard’s video on YouTube, spurring others to, “Keep your head up. Keep your heart strong. Keep your mind set.”

What fun and check!

Then he said to name three things/blessings you’re thankful for.

  • God
  • Family
  • Friends

Check.

Lastly, pick one goal you will accomplish today.

“The real voyage of discovery lies not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”

Yup.

I’ll be watching. Looking. Waiting.

Because the ordinary really can be extraordinary.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Life From Thorns

I once knew a girl from Wisconsin who blinked naked.

She confessed to pulling out her eyelashes because she couldn’t help it.

Although it seemed strange to me, a popular phrase at the time, spilled like dangerous rapids into my mind and a death-trap out of my mouth:

“Whatever floats your boat.”

Who knew barren eyelids were only a symptom of a wasteland life?

Standing on opposite sides of a barbed-wire fence, the lush green pasture beneath me lay in stark contrast to the fallow ground under my country neighbor.

“Aren’t they pretty? I want to decorate one for Christmas!” She pointed to a patch of Cyran tumbleweeds beside her.

She was so earnest I didn’t have the heart to tell her by winter they’d be nothing but spine corpses. Or that was one of the weirdest things I’d ever heard.

So, I did what any damaged and empty, person would do. I rejected her. For good.

By December 25, her brother died by suicide. She and the rest of her detached family-like the prickly bushes she loved-rolled away.

The next spring, I heard an old, old story about a hill far away and a Savior who came from glory.

That baby born in a manger I’d celebrated the season before, turned out to be God’s Son all grown up. Sent from heaven to earth as the message of God’s love.

As proof, He went about doing good; healing the sick, opening blind eyes and deaf ears, and even raising the dead back to life.

So, why did people hate Him?

And if He was all-powerful, what good could possibly come from His horrific beatings, torture, and death on a splintered tree?

Jesus spiked to a cross. A thorn-crowned King.

Dying to save the world.

Dying to save me.

How bizarre!

That is one of the weirdest things I’d ever heard.

Life from thorns?

So, I did what any damaged, empty person CAN do. I accepted Him. For good.

Winter’s lingered in my corner of the world. Record-breaking snowfall left our region freezer-burned and lifeless. And though it’s officially Spring, the days have been colored in dismal gray. Like a tombstone.

Yesterday, a stinging spat and hurt feelings between my husband me brought the same.

“Come here, there’s something I want to show you!” My husband called from the open garage door.

Shaking off my resentment and hurt, I reluctantly followed. He stopped near the utility boxes on the side of our house.

Photo courtesy of Glenda Zylinski

Was that a tumbleweed nest?

How weird!

“Is that what killed our phone and internet connections?” I sighed.

My husband shook his head.

“Look closer.”

My breath caught.

Photo courtesy of Glenda Zylinski

Life from thorns.

Photo courtesy of Glenda Zylinski

 

Tracking Tomorrow

Photo courtesy of Pexels

How are you chasing someday?

Perhaps you know and use one of the seven tools Michael Hyatt recommends on his blog where he writes about moving beyond “good intentions to taking action and systematically measuring progress.”

7 Apps to Help You Achieve Your Goals and Build New Habits

  • Nozbe
  • Goals on Track
  • Life Tick
  • Strides
  • Coach.Me
  • Habit List
  • irunurun

Or maybe you’re like me and calendarize your life on hardcopy squares with bright stickers and color coded appointments, deadlines, and other important dates.

I’m praying about and working hard to meet goals large and small (Finish a book in seven months, lose 2 pounds a week this month, attend a live online webinar, find an Easter outfit, answer a snail mail letter from my mother-in-law, and that task I’ve put off far too long-clean the fridge!).

It’s possible, that like me, you also keep ongoing commitments to your church, volunteer work; school or non-profit organization or other public services opportunities.

But how often do we add fun?

“When was the last time you tried something for the first time?”

Just yesterday, one of my favorite music groups, the band Switchfoot, gave me that pop quiz via a CD in my car (as I completed errands scratched hastily in forest green on my 2017 Bless Israel kitchen calendar).

At breakfast this morning, I asked my hubby and his eyes glazed over trying to remember.

I ticked off a list of some ultra-memorable firsts:

  • Snuba diving in crystalline waters off the shore of a tropical island
  • Horseback riding on the beach
  • Kayaking on a mountain lake

Some notable firsts:

  • Attending a Switchfoot concert
  • Hiking a mountain logging road to the tippy-top (and being rewarded with wave upon wave of pine forest as far as the eye could see…)
  • Riding the Matterhorn (scariest at the time) in a popular CA theme park

Some fun firsts:

  • Trying alligator and conch appetizers
  • Strawberry cherries
  • Making baba ganoush (an eggplant dip) and hummus from scratch

And some hobby firsts:

  • Making a pinwheel baby quilt stitched by hand
  • Teaching myself crochet (I’m working on my fifth blanket in two years)
  • Learning watercolor painting techniques through a community class

So, while we’re grinding grueling to make ends meet, carry out commitments to worthy causes, or leave our mark on the sands of time, I propose penciling, plugging, or stylusing in recreational breaks and hobbies. Maybe something new?

www.postivelypresent.com reveals:

7 Benefits of Having Hobbies

  1. Hobbies encourage taking a break
  2. Hobbies promote eustress (that positive kind of stress)
  3. Hobbies offer a new challenge
  4. Hobbies unite you with others
  5. Hobbie provide an outlet for stress
  6. Hobbies promote staying in the present
  7. Hobbies have physical health benefits

Relaxing or learning something new doesn’t have to be expensive. Googling things to do on a budget yields some great ideas!

Exploring a new bicycle trail to catch memories with my hubby will fill tomorrow’s calendar square nicely.

Today.

Photo courtesy of pixaby.com/Gkenius

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

12 & 11/12

She was only four months old when she picked my husband and stole his heart.

Sealing the deal, she left two parting gifts on the church’s gym floor.

“It’s what puppies do,” I said to her embarrassed tween caregiver.

All her littermates claimed a high price to go home with their new families. She was the runt with an umbilical hernia requiring surgery, and if she couldn’t be given away, her next stop; the local dog shelter.

Although adopting Belle-whom I called Bella Chocolat for long (from the french for Beautiful Chocolate)-wasn’t in our family’s five-year plan or budget when a furry friend does the choosing, Providence often makes a way.

Our family, like our nation, was still reeling and healing from the unthinkable attacks and horror from the year before.

Belle proved to be a welcome distraction from the residual social and emotional effects of the traumatic events of 9/11/2001.

In a dogvacay.com blog post, I learned:

10 Surprising Reasons Your Dog is Good for Your Health

  1. Boost Your Mood
  2. Better Than Medicine
  3. Help You Stay Active
  4. Help You Be More Social
  5. Help Relieve Stress
  6. Can Help Kids Grow Stronger
  7. Help Us Understand Cancer
  8. Can Help Treat Rheumatoid Arthritis
  9. Are Therapeutic For Kids With ADHD
  10. Can Make You A Better Person

From the day we brought her home, Belle would hysterically compete with me for the Alpha Female spot in our family with three males. If I was hugging my husband or two sons, she was right there, squeezing between us.

Even so, she earned my respect just two weeks from the time she became a Zylinski. On a family camping trip, when a stray wolfdog three times her size trotted near our site, she lunged at him, straining against her collar and leash to bark him away.

Like any dog, she brought equal parts of cheer and chagrin. She delighted us with her love for swimming and was soon dubbed, Belle of the River. She was known to swim with geese, play tag with beavers, and fetch a tennis ball for hours.

But a confining bathtub? Let the battle begin!

And like most Labrador Retrievers she stayed a puppy well into her fifth year. Digging holes in the lawn, chewing on chair legs and stairs and cedar siding of our house. Or inhaling a whole tub of Brummel and Brown/margarine snatched from a corner of the dining table.

One year, several neighbors gathered with me to make festive fall cookie wreaths. I had laid mine on a card table in our home to dry before hanging it on our front door.

The next morning all that was left was wire and pieces of cardboard on the floor! Belle wasn’t the only one with digestive problems…

My husband and I laughed often as she played eye tag with either of us to get our attention, or growled at her reflection in our large picture window scaring herself so as to launch herself on the closest lap; or whipped up a strong wind with her helicopter tail.

For some reason, I’ve measured life in increments. Holding on too long, or letting go too soon.

Belle taught me about living in the moment. And being content.

For years she played the escape artist rushing headlong out a door left ajar, if only for a second, by an unsuspecting bystander. Or lifting the latch on the fence gate to run away. Often in our searches for her, we didn’t know if we’d see her again.

It took much time and patience to train her to stay close to home and to the ones who loved her most.

Like it took God much time and patience to help me do the same. Although the next adventure and something “out there” seemed just the thing to fulfill a deeper longing, it never did.

At nearly thirteen hip dysplasia and a loss of appetite meant we had to say a hard goodbye.

Our vet sent us a pet sympathy card. A first for me. I’d never been taught that grieving the loss of an animal was okay.

Our Bella Chocolat has been gone 1 & 11/12 years now.

The only thing I have left of her I’m getting rid of today. Her sweet nose print on my writing room window.

It’s way past time.

A goodbye for good.

Bonhoeffer said it well, “There is nothing that can replace the absence of someone dear to us, and one should not even attempt to do so; one must simply endure it.”

But her memory will ever linger; her robust bark or standing on her hind legs hugs. The joy and delight she added to our family.

All 12 & 7/12 years.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Can a Legend Make History?

What better day than St. Patrick’s Day to talk about folklore versus facts?

A receipt checker at Costco noticed the box of Godiva assorted Belgian chocolates in my cart and asked me what I knew about the fabled female adorning the cover.

“All I know about Lady Godiva is that she was infamous for riding through the streets on a dapple-grey steed in nothing but her long hair.”

She smiled.

“That’s all I’d heard, too. Google her. You’ll be surprised.”

I did. And I was.

Funny how I’d never taken the time to search out the matter further, relying only on hearsay and bits and pieces of conversations about her over the years.

History describes the study of past events.

Legend means a traditional story sometimes popularly regarded as historical but unauthenticated.

Lady G. falls neatly into neither category.

According to Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia, she was:

“…a Countess of Mercia. An English noblewoman, the wife of Leofric, Earl of Mercia.

If she is the same Godiva who appears in the history of Ely Abbey, the Liber Eliensis, written at the end of the 12th century, then she was a widow when Leofric married her. Both Leofric and Godiva were generous benefactors to religious houses.

The legend of the nude ride is first recorded in the 13th century, in the Flores Historiarum and the adaptations of it by Roger Wendover: despite its considerable age, it is not regarded as plausible by modern historians.

The typical version of the story:

Lady Godiva took pity on the people of Coventry, who were suffering grievously under her husband’s oppressive taxation. Lady Godiva appealed again and again to her husband, who obstinately refused to remit the tolls. At last, weary of her entreaties, he said he would grant her request if she would strip naked and ride on a horse through the streets of the town. Lady Godiva took him at his word, and after issuing a proclamation that all persons should stay indoors and shut their windows, she rode through the town, clothed only in her long hair. Just one person in the town, a tailor ever afterward known as Peeping Tom, disobeyed her proclamation in one of the most famous instances of voyeurism.”

Celebrate or censure?

Maybe you’ve heard of Laurel Thatcher Ulrich? In 1976 she wrote a scholarly article about little-studied Puritan funeral services. Perhaps you’ve heard the quote that went viral not long after, or seen it on mugs, t-shirts or decals:

“Well-behaved women seldom made history.”

She went on to write a book using the title which examines ways in which women shaped history using examples from the lives of Rosa Parks and Harriet Tubman, to name a few.

Whenever I hear or see that famous line, I think of a broad spectrum of women. From world leaders like Golda Meir to another woman with long hair.

You can read all about the latter in the gospel of Luke, chapter 7 verses 36-50.

This story is historical fact and is found in the pages of God’s word, the Bible.

In this account, “When a woman who had lived a sinful life in that town learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee’s house, she brought an alabaster jar of perfume, and as she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them.”

What kind of love would motivate a woman of ill repute to audaciously scorn being scorned by the powerful leaders of her day to offer her most precious gifts–her tears, her expensive ointment, her hair, her time– to the object of that love?

Celebrate or censure?